7 Things That Are Too Real About Lagos On A Monday Morning

Is it a myth or are Mondays truly mentally stressful? For some reason, Mondays in Lagos leave people with a certain level of discomfort. There are loads of contributing factors to this and we are here to highlight some of them. We hope that gives you something to prepare for if you ever plan to relocate to the big city- Lagos.

Traffic
This is as constant as the “K” you had to find in electrodynamics equations in physics class back in high school. You can’t have a Monday in Lagos without traffic. There are no escape routes either. You just have degrees of traffic, like traffic, go-slow and then lock down. So brace yourself for this, leave earlier than you would on a weekday. And the typical starter kit would help too- phones with fully charged batteries, power banks, data and a bottle of water.

Angry bus drivers
The weekend is never enough for these ones. So, for all the IJGBs or the recently moved to Lagos gang, remind yourself that everyone else driving on the road is insane. Simply avoid them. Also, the public transport bus drivers have nothing to lose, their buses are as good as gone, so just don’t get into a road struggle with them on a Monday morning. And no, they aren’t gonna slow down when you’re trying to overtake them. Get used to that.

Too many people

Remember that moment as a kid when you looked away from your mum during Christmas shopping only to look back and not find her again? Well, that’s typically how you feel the first time you get to a bus stop in Lagos on a Monday morning. There’s always a crowd of people.

Someone pressed the fast forward button

Seeing too many people is just a half of it, here’s the other half, -everyone acts like a fast forward whistle went off somewhere. People are typically marching and walking in long quick strides. It’s like watching a movie in fast forward. Nobody is here to play, their dreams aren’t waiting for them.

Hawkers trying to beat weekly target
Someone must have tipped the hawkers in Lagos that everyone else leaves their house hungry. So, they come shoving their items in your face with a “You must need this” expression all over their faces. You would also see them chase vehicles with a certain dedication that make you wonder if they’re trying to beat their weekly target in one day.

Third mainland bridge is not for learners
This part of Lagos should have a “professionals only” sign post put up on the bridge. Driving on third mainland bridge requires all the expertise ever. It’s a combination of numbers 1, 2, 3 and 4. Yes! Picture that, especially when you haven’t stayed in Lagos long enough to master the special skill of third mainland bridge driving.

Weekend-long body odours
We also strongly feel the need to warn you of this part if you have to commute via public transport. Even though it’s barely 8:00 am in the morning, prepare for people with weekend long body odours who might try to rub against you in buses. But that’s nothing your premier cool saturated shower can’t handle.

If you survive Lagos on a Monday morning, then you are truly ready to take on the world. So here’s something that should excite you, there’s enough room for everyone here. Great ideas and the right drive are all you need to excel in the big city. What are your Monday morning experiences of Lagos?

Photo credit:  jumiatravel.com